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The Wordsmith's Forge
The Writing & Other Projects of Elizabeth Barrette
ysabetwordsmith
ysabetwordsmith
Poem: "Building Suspense"
Here is another poem from the October 13, 2009 Poetry Fishbowl. This one was prompted by whuffle and sponsored by dormouse_in_tea.


Building Suspense



It was a place
that lay abandoned in the sun,
still smelling faintly of fear and despair.

It was a place
that people preferred to avoid
even before it was abandoned, but now
the old mental hospital was positively repellant.

It was a place
that would have been easier to avoid
if it had stayed in the same space, but no,
it moved – or seemed to move –
and at any rate the fire department was tired
of hearing it had burned down
only to find it lurking on its lot in the morning.

It was a place
that the crazy people had said was alive
but nobody believed them
until it was too late.

It was a place
banished from its own dimension, alone here
except for its food, which sometimes it spoke to.

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9 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
From: minor_architect Date: October 15th, 2009 01:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
alone here except for its food, which sometimes it spoke to

I totally dig the ending to this poem! >;)
fayanora From: fayanora Date: October 17th, 2009 05:34 am (UTC) (Link)
Me too!
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: October 17th, 2009 10:52 pm (UTC) (Link)

Yay!

I'm pleased. I think it adds to the creepiness, and invites just a hint of sympathy for the building itself.
fayanora From: fayanora Date: October 17th, 2009 05:36 am (UTC) (Link)
Reminds me of some art I did:



ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: October 17th, 2009 10:27 pm (UTC) (Link)

O_O

Those are creepy.
fayanora From: fayanora Date: October 18th, 2009 12:36 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: O_O

Indeed they are. I have a lot of creepy art: http://fayanora.23ae.com/LLS/artwork.htm
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: October 18th, 2009 01:55 am (UTC) (Link)

Wow!

That is some awesome art. May I link to this in a separate post, so that more folks can enjoy it?
fayanora From: fayanora Date: October 18th, 2009 01:58 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Wow!

Sure!
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: October 18th, 2009 02:21 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Wow!

Thanks. I'll get on this.
9 comments or Leave a comment