frustratedThe Age of Stupidity
Zachary Christie, a six-year-old “A” student at John R. Downes Elementary School in Delaware, brought his favorite Cub Scout camping utensil (a combination knife, fork, and spoon) to school to eat lunch with it — he eats all his meals at home with it and saw no problem with taking it to school. That afternoon, Zachary was suspended from school and, according to the rules of the Christina School District’s zero-tolerance policy toward weapons in school, he faces a mandatory 45-day sentence in the school district’s alternative school — that’s where all the “bad” kids go.
There are a variety of problems afoot, including increased violence in schools, racism, and schools turning into prisons. All of these are serious concerns. And most "solutions" I've seen so far seem to address one or two of these related problems by blowing off the other(s). This does not work.
For maximum effect, discipline should start at the low end and work up to the high end:
1) Was the rule broken deliberately? Kids don't have the memory or judgement of adults. They may not know what the rules are, or if they heard the rules, may not fully understand them or realize that what seems like an innocent act to them is something they're actually not supposed to do. Most kids follow most of the rules most of the time. If you point out that they've broken a rule, discuss the rule until you're sure they understand it as best they can at their age, and then ask them to promise not to break that rule -- they will probably not do the same thing again. Problem solved, for about 80-90% of your student body. Cost: anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes of time from an adult who understands how kids think and cares about their success. This is more than some schools are willing or able to provide, which is pretty pathetic.
2) If the rule was broken deliberately, there are other considerations.
Is this a first problem, a third problem, or a thirtieth problem? A student who is usually well-behaved and makes an occasional slip or acts up is different from a student who habitually causes trouble, and if you have any sense at all you want that good student to stay good. Putting them in with a lot of bad students is counterproductive to that. So for students who rarely break the rules, mild to moderate punishments enforce discipline without causing damage: things like extra homework (for academic offenses), cleaning school property (for graffiti or the like), or after-school counseling sessions (for social offenses). Cost: 30+ minutes of discussion from a principal or counselor.
A student who misbehaves habitually and deliberately is looking for trouble -- and attention. Ideally, figure out what's gone wrong that makes them want to act like that. They may have a learning disability, domestic unrest, or simply be bored by work that is years below their capacity. Fixing the source usually causes the misbehavior to dry up, if not immediately, at least eventually. It's the difference between trying to stop the flow of water at the spigot or at the valve. But in the meantime, this is a place where more serious punishment such as suspension may be necessary. Cost: Hours or weeks of analysis and resolution, often requiring professional assistance.
How serious was the offense? Minor offenses should draw less punishment than major offenses. Otherwise, you have this problem:
"What's the penalty for rebellion?"
"Death."
"What's the penalty for being late?"
"Death." "Well, guess what? We're late!"
Zero-tolerance, all-crimes-are-equal policies consistently raise the number and severity of crimes. Not every time, but in the long run they do, and it tends to get really ugly. Notice that none of the historic or fictional examples are considered heroic or even sane, except for schools.
3) Always have a diverse assortment of punishments available. These should be things that people dislike, but are not destructive to the person. Preferably the punishment should fit the crime and accomplish some kind of productive goal so it isn't simply a waste. Hitting kids is generally a bad idea; it teaches them that violence is acceptable, which is hopefully not what you want.
Kids know if you are just wasting their time, and they resent it; but if their punishment includes something productive, there is a non-zero chance of them appreciating that. Astute parents and teachers therefore keep a handy list of necessary tasks that are boring/unpleasant, to be assigned to mischief-makers.
Punishments that fit the crime are more effective than random ones. Frex, teasing the classroom pet could lead to cleaning out the cage (with the pet in the hands of someone more responsible). Children often have a hard time drawing connections that adults see easily; a close match here highlights the connection between misbehavior and punishment beyond the arbitrary "some grownup is mad at me."
Any offense that includes ignorance as a component is an ideal candidate for extra homework. Cheating, verbal abuse, bullying, etc. can be handled by assigning the student to research (preferably with supervision) that problem in the larger world; write a report about its causes, drawbacks, and solutions; then discuss the results with an adult. Students prone to physical and/or verbal violence might even be sent through conflict-resolution or anger-management training. Sometimes people do stuff because they don't know any other way; make sure they have those healthy options.
If you pay attention, you'll be able to tailor the punishment to the offender; this is crucial because some kids enjoy things that are supposed to be punishments. A kid who hates sports and loves reading will enjoy being banished to the library during kickball at recess; a kid who enjoys physical activity will not be dissuaded by running laps or pushups.
4) Don't forget the carrot as well as the stick. Schools have lots of privileges they can hand out to students who earn them, or take away from students who misbehave. High-end perks can include things like not needing a hall pass to use the bathroom, or being able to visit the library during recess, for trustworthy A students. Average perks might include fun movies or assemblies that all students routinely enjoy once a month or so, which can be revoked for troublemakers.
The end result of all this may take more time and attention from adults, but produces far more effective reduction of misbehavior.
Moving along ...
Both racism and school violence are social problems that respond best to social solutions. You need an adequate supply of well-trained teachers, with decent school supplies. This costs money, which people often begrudge. (Somehow they forget that jails are a lot more expensive than schools.) Plenty of programs are available to train staff and students in tolerance and conflict resolution. This requires an overall investment of time, money, and other resources to create a positive school environment. Most people don't want to do this kind of work either. They would rather blame young people for being "bad," since that's easier and gets them off the hook for having a school that's actually safe and effective. They're satisfied if students merely refrain from breaking the rules and failing the government tests.
If you want young people to learn, succeed, and thrive as decent human beings then they need an appropriate framework to do that. Why should you care? Because they'll be running the country when you are old and decrepit, and you will be in their power. If you have raised a generation or two of violent fools, you will not enjoy the results.
October 14 2009, 19:20:24 UTC 11 years ago
He was definitely wrong to have been horsing about in the bus, and he did *claim* to have a knife, but even if he did have one, he wasn't threatening anyone, and no one was unhappy or scared.
It was a very aggravating situation.
But, during his suspension, I suggested that we do something for some group--any group--in need, and he suggested people in Haiti. So, he made cookies and sold them and we sent the money to Yele Haiti.
Thoughts
October 14 2009, 23:08:17 UTC 11 years ago
Very badly handled by the school, too. Kids don't have adult judgment; they often do things that adults would know better than to do. It's part of growing up. Kids need to be able to make mistakes and learn from them effectively. That's not going to happen if adults go apeshit whenever a kid makes a mistake. Even if it's a big mistake, that's when you need to be the grownup and not freak out.
If adults freak over things that aren't real or are blown out of proportion, then kids are likely to conclude that rules are stupid and arbitrary. That's going to be bad if they wind up doing jury duty someday. It's also bad if the kid is trying to distinguish between rules of custom (raise your hand before asking a question in class) and rules of safety (look both ways before crossing the street). Serious troublemakers often ignore all the rules and thus are more likely to suffer accidents. Which is Darwin award territory, but a preventable tragedy that adults had ought to prevent.
Then too, if adults freak out over mistakes, the kids will start to do the same thing. That teaches them that irrational, overblown panic or anger responses are appropriate ways of dealing with a problem. So when something upsetting happens, the kids overreact, which is annoying and impractical at best and dangerous at worst. Plus which, kids can become so afraid of making mistakes and being punished that they curl up and avoid doing anything that might draw attention. That's no way to have a healthy, active life.
A more sensible response would've been a trip to the principal's office with a discussion like, "Claiming to have a knife when you don't is lying; we have a rule about not lying. We have a rule about not horsing around on the bus, too, and you also broke that. The punishments for those are X and Y. Now let's talk about what you did. It can be fun to fool around with your friends, but if you're careless, people can get hurt. What if someone on the bus had really been attacked with a knife before? How do you think that would make them feel? A bus driver needs to focus on driving the bus. What if you and your friends created so much of a distraction that the bus wrecked?"
Kids learn about actions and consequences, and how to think ahead before they do something, by being walked through that process by adults. If you skip that step and just punish them, they may not learn to think before acting, and you will be continually unhappy with the results. If they don't get it the first time, or the fifteenth, keep trying. Sometimes that quality takes a while to grow in.
I am amazed by how many "educators" fail to grasp this simple fact.
Re: Thoughts
October 14 2009, 23:15:22 UTC 11 years ago
In the actual situation, it was hard to have a wise response--I was distracted by other things--by wondering, for instance, whether my son *did* have a knife (and if so where he got it from and where it disappeared to) and whether or not I could believe him--and also by the power dynamics of the situation with the school administration. I could understand (though it wasn't my primary focus at the time) that their reaction was dictated by policies that had been laid down earlier, that they couldn't deviate from those without maybe being accused of being inconsistent in their enforcement. But when does one change bad policies?
*headache*
Re: Thoughts
October 15 2009, 02:21:40 UTC 11 years ago
It's always harder to think in the heat of a crisis, and often easier to figure out a good solution later. That's one reason why making important decisions in the heat is a last resort; anything that can be allowed to cool down first, should be. That's another mistake schools often make with discipline. It's like the difference between screaming at your kid and smacking him when he breaks a vase, and saying, "I'm very angry with you right now. Go to your room while I try to calm down and think about this like an adult -- and YOU think about what you just did wrong."
>>their reaction was dictated by policies that had been laid down earlier, that they couldn't deviate from those without maybe being accused of being inconsistent in their enforcement.<<
A well-designed policy is flexible and contains options to address all previously known subtypes of incident, along with some method for determining how to deal with new challenges that don't fit previous examples. As policies become more and more rigid, they become less and less effective, increasing friction between all parties.
>> But when does one change bad policies? <<
As soon as they cause a problem, or it is clear that they are about to do so, or someone thinks of a better solution than what's in the policy.
In the legal system, this is often dealt with by getting a lawyer to challenge the validity of the law. In the school system, one option is to say, "As a parent, I don't feel that this policy fits this situation/is a constructive form of discipline. I believe that if you go through with this, it will teach my child the wrong lesson and I will have a hard time cleaning up after that. Let's talk to the principal/school board/other authority and find a more appropriate and effective way of dealing with this challenge." You have to identify who made the bad policy, explain to them what harm it will cause, and propose a better policy (preferably with citations to back up your claims, such as references to conflict-resolution resources).
If they tell you to shove off, give them one warning. And then go around to all the other parents you know, and write to all the local papers, and make a gigantic stink about how they insisted on mishandling the situation after you pointed out the flaws and proposed a better alternative. The better a case you've made, the stupider they will look, the more grief they will get from other people, and the harder it will be for school board members to get reelected. Plus, you will be creating a paper trail, so that the next time the stupid policy causes a preventable disaster, it will be easy to prove that they could have avoided that disaster -- which is very useful if someone decides that a lawsuit is in order.
Always start with the simplest and most reasonable approach. If it doesn't work, you can escalate later, and you tried your best. Then no matter how irrational and immature other people are being, your child will at least see you behaving like a sensible adult.
Re: Thoughts
October 15 2009, 06:46:58 UTC 11 years ago
This is one of the biggest reasons I refuse to approach certain MU*s. The rigidity of their authorities, and the ridiculous behavior engendered thereby, leave me wanting no part of contributing to their domain.