Poem: "Bad Turn to Good"

This poem came out of the November 2, 2021 Poetry Fishbowl. It was inspired by prompts from chanter1944 and rix_scaedu. It also fills the "I've seen bad turn to good plenty of times." square in my 11-1-21 card for the NCIS Bingo fest. This poem has been sponsored by a pool with fuzzyred, ng_moonmoth, janetmiles, and edorfaus. It belongs to the Trichromatic Attachments thread of the Polychrome Heroics series. It follows "The Things You Do," "Never Accept an Apology," "Spiraling Out of Control," "The Fourth for My Enemies," "When in a Dark Place," and "Our Power to Change," so read those first or this won't make much sense.

Warning: This poem contains intense and controversial topics. Highlight to read the warnings, some of which are spoilers. It includes the aftermath of problem drinking, frenemies, awkward conversations, reference to past misuse of superpowers, trust issues, emotional ineptitude, relationship issues, communication difficulties, apologies, self-loathing, and other challenges. If these are sensitive issues for you, please consider your tastes and headspace before reading onward.


"Bad Turn to Good"

[Saturday, November 23, 2013]

It took nearly two months before
Cavalier and Princessa could
finally manage to pin down
Tarnish when he was actually
in a condition to talk with them.

Cavalier had glimpsed him once
in Pocatello, Idaho but couldn't
get close enough to catch him.
That was back in September.

Then they had spotted Tarnish
just outside of Billings, Montana
and trailed him clear back here --
surprisingly, in the same town
where he had gotten so drunk.

After asking around Riverton,
Princessa heard that Tarnish
was staying not far away at
the Lonesome Wind Retreat.

So they booked a cabin there
and then went looking for him.

They found him fiddling with
a wire fence that had a big hole
stomped in it, a scarf wrapped
around him against the cold.

"What are you doing?"
Cavalier asked him.

"Trying to patch this up,"
said Tarnish. "They're
shorthanded today, so
a friend asked me to help."

Cavalier was still trying to wrap
his mind around Tarnish having
made new friends so fast here
when Princessa jumped in.

"What's the fence for?"
she said. "I don't see
any cows or horses here."

"Bison," Tarnish said, pointing
to a scatter of brown dots far in
the distance. "The idea is to divide
the pasture and move them around
so that the herds don't overgraze
the grass in any given place."

"Does that actually do any good?"
Cavalier wondered. "Bison are big."

Tarnish laughed. "About as much good
as locking a door does with supervillains.
If they're in a tolerant mood, then they'll
mind it, but don't imagine they have to."

"I see the resemblance," said Princessa.

"We haven't seen you around much,"
said Cavalier. "Usually we wind up
scrapping around a lot more, but
I couldn't even catch up to you
when I spotted you in Pocatello."

"I wasn't out looking for trouble,
just celebrating some successes,"
Tarnish replied. He looked back
towards Riverton. "I'd just finished
a one-month module on coping skills,
so I wanted to go see a movie."

"Coping skills?" Princessa said.
"That seems ... new for you."

"Yeah, but it's working great,"
said Tarnish. "I haven't gotten
that drunk since I started it.
The Sobering Center really
helped me figure stuff out."

"Good," Cavalier said. "That's
good. I know things are rough."

"They have been, but it's looking up,"
said Tarnish. "I've made new friends.
That's why I took a trip up to Billings
earlier this week, shopping for them."

"What sort of shopping?" said Princessa.
"We picked up your trail at the Barn Market."

"I went up for Thanksgiving supplies,"
said Tarnish. "Bam-Bam already shot
some wild turkeys. Rowan Birkenshaw
plans to smoke them. Tom Clearwater
took me out fly fishing, but I'm ... not
good at it yet." He rubbed his shoulder.
"So I got nominated to go shopping."

"Any luck with it, or did we interrupt
your trip too soon?" said Cavalier. He
felt a little guilty for chasing Tarnish,
but really, what else could they do?
"We really didn't mean to crash that."

"I got the fancy cheeses I was sent for,
a guinea hen, some heirloom pumpkins
and squashes, pomegranates -- and
some handspun yarn I couldn't resist,
for me and a friend," said Tarnish.

"Let me guess, that speckly kind
you love so much," said Cavalier.
"But what're you going to do with it?"

"Close, mine's gray with a multicolor twist,"
said Tarnish. "I'm uh, trying to learn how
to knit, but I'm not good at that either."

"It takes practice," said Cavalier.
"You'll get the hang of it eventually."

"I hope so," said Tarnish. He cut off
a broken wire, then tacked a new one
between the fenceposts. "So why did you
track me down? I've missed you, but I
was hoping to make more progress."

"We need to talk," said Cavalier.

Tarnish winced. "Yeah," he said.
"I owe you an apology or few."

Cavalier was startled. Sure,
Tarnish would apologize if
he messed up, but he didn't
usually jump into it like that.

"Don't look at me, I haven't
touched him," said Princessa.
"Whatever that is, it's all him."

"Like I said, I've been working
on some stuff," Tarnish replied.

"We've been batting around
some things too," said Cavalier.
"After you rolled me, Princessa
took me to see Aubrey the Alabaster,
and that started a few conversations."

"I'm sorry," said Tarnish. "I shouldn't
have pushed you as hard as I did."

"Yeah, that's not really like you,"
Cavalier said with a frown.

"You wouldn't talk to me
any other way," said Tarnish.

"I wasn't ready to talk about
what you forced me to say,"
Cavalier said, looking away.

"Well I know that now!"
Tarnish almost shrieked.

Princessa patted the air.
"We didn't come here to fight.
We just wanted to clear things up."

"I'm listening," Tarnish invited,
but he was looking at Cavalier.

"That was ... you really hurt me
this time," Cavalier said. "Like I
could feel your hand around
my heart, squeezing it."

Tarnish flinched and
looked away from him.
"I'm sorry," he repeated.
"I shouldn't have done it."

"Throwing me out in the hall
when I couldn't walk straight
didn't help either," said Cavalier.

"I'm sorry for knocking you out,
kidnapping you, tying you up, using
my powers to force a confession,
and then abandoning you while you
weren't level-headed," said Tarnish.
"That was wrong. You deserve better."

"Usually you are better," said Cavalier.
"I wasn't expecting you to get that rough."

Tarnish scrunched into himself. "Sorry.
Are you ... okay? No permanent damage?"

"I had Aubrey check," said Princessa.
"She insisted that Cavalier was fine."

"Except the hurt feelings," said Cavalier.

"So how can I make it up to you?"
Tarnish asked. "Usually I'd offer
to buy you a beer, but that seems ...
I don't think it's a good idea now."

"Probably not," said Cavalier.
"I don't want to knock you off
the wagon if you're doing better."

"I haven't given up booze, just
trying to avoid binge drinking,"
said Tarnish. "That's not so fun."

"Well, we're still glad that you're
making progress," said Princessa.

"Thanks," said Tarnish, then turned
to look at Cavalier. "How about I
owe you a favor? You can call me
to help with a hassle or whatever."

Cavalier thought about it. "Okay,
apology accepted," he said. "If I
wanted fluff, I'd date cheerleaders."

"There was that cute guy from
Wyoming Spirit," said Tarnish.

"That was definitely a mistake,"
Cavalier said with a groan.

"We were wondering if you
might consider working things
out between us," said Princessa.
"We've been tripping over each other
for months, and we're all unhappy."

"I've missed you," Tarnish said,
"but I'm probably bad for you."

"I've seen bad turn to good
plenty of times," Princessa said.

Tarnish shook his head. "You
don't know me," he insisted.
"I ruin everything I touch."

He reached out to lay
a fingertip on a scrap
of the discarded fencing.

The wire that he touched
rusted away instantly.

"You can't turn it off?"
Princessa said. "I mean,
your clothes aren't rotting
to bits, so you must have
some control over it."

"Some being the word
for it," Tarnish muttered.

"You haven't ruined me,"
Cavalier said quietly, laying
a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Tarnish flinched. "Yet," he said.

"Okay," Cavalier said, letting go.
"If this isn't something you want,
I can take no for an answer.

Tarnish looked even more
miserable. "I don't know."

"We don't need to decide
anything now," said Princessa.
"Aubrey suggested that we talk
with some friends of hers who
know complicated relationships."

"Well, it sure is that," Tarnish said.
"I'm willing to try yours if you'll
consider some of mine too."

"Like what?" said Princessa.
She looked at Cavalier, and
he nodded. "We're open
to some suggestions here."

"Maybe ... meet some
of the people I've been
hanging out with recently,"
said Tarnish. "There'll be
a big feast for Thanksgiving
at Lonesome Wind Retreat.
You could, um. Come to that.
If you wanted to try things out."

"Holiday feast sounds good
to me," Cavalier agreed.
"I'd like to come for that."

"I've been doing some ...
classes and stuff too,"
said Tarnish. "Not sure
how to make that fit yet.
Well, no, we should go out
with Tom, he is awesome
as a trail guide. You'll love it."

"Okay, I'm up for that, but why
a trail guide?" Princessa asked.

"Nature helps me feel calmer,"
said Tarnish. "Turns out, doing
more different activities makes it
work better than just storming
through the forest in a huff. So
hiking, horseback riding, canoeing,
and my pathetic attempts at fishing."

"We booked a cabin," said Princessa.
"We have some time for exploring."

"Also, we might want to list stuff
to discuss with Aubrey's friends,"
said Cavalier. "I don't know about
you, but I'm less likely to freak out
about that if I'm out in the woods
than in a crowd or even a cabin."

"Good idea," Tarnish said. "Tom
won't mind, he's used to helping
people deal with, well, whatever."

Cavalier raised his eyebrows.
"He won't flip over superpowers?"

"Nah, the local tribes like people
with special abilities, even if it's not
from the same tradition," said Tarnish.
"They've had me trying to tint bells and
stuff for regalia, to bring up the pattern."

"Does that work?" said Cavalier. "I've
never seen you use it like that before."

"It's new, Roy put me up to it, and yeah,
sometimes it works," said Tarnish. "Or
at least it doesn't always crumble now."

Cavalier leaned over and bumped
their shoulders gently together. "See,
practice," he said. "So let's give this
a try and find out what we can do
if we're not all just butting heads."

Tarnish looked desperately wistful.
"Okay," he said. "Let's try that."

* * *

Notes:

This poem is long, so its character, setting, and content notes will appear separately.