PACE Planning
You know how I keep saying, "Always have an exit plan. Always have a Plan B." about things? I found this brilliant quote:
In Army Special Forces, there is a PACE mnemonic used in planning: What’s the Primary plan? The Alternate plan? The Contingency plan? The Emergency plan? The Emergency Plan is sometimes referred to as the “Everything went to shit plan.”
Thinking about it ...
* The Primary Plan is the best option, what you will do if at all possible. Frex, we want to eat at Cow Heaven.
* The Alternate Plan is a similar option that will also work well, if some part of the Primary Plan is not executable or has become undesirable. If Cow Heaven is closed or too crowded, then we will divert to Meat Mavens. It's just as good, merely a bit farther away.
* The Contingency Plan accounts for specific known failure modes, and you should have a contingency plan for each predictable problem. These are not necessarily similar or as desirable as the Primary Plan, but they will meet the most essential requirements. If pregnant!Sue suddenly announces that she can't stand the smell of cooking meat, we will divert to Salad Palace. It may not be as tasty, but everyone will be able to eat there.
* The Emergency Plan is for when lots of things go wrong at once. It is far from ideal, but will salvage whatever can be accomplished from the original goals. If pregnant!Sue goes into labor, husband!John will drive her to the hospital while the rest of us head home and order pizza. Our evening plans may be shot, but we can at least get some food on the table.
So that's a good standard approach to planning: at least four options, more if you need to cover multiple failure modes with different contingency plans. There won't always be ways to fix all possible problems, but this approach will encourage you to cover what can be predicted and compensated for. It's not paranoia; it's being prepared for whatever comes your way. If anyone picks on you about it, point out the origin of that PACE.
Also, if your "friends" don't want to make accommodations for you or each other based on changing situations like this? They're not such great friends, and maybe not helpful to have in an emergency that requires creative problem-solving at speed. Good friends and competent problem-solvers want everyone to get their needs met as much as possible and are brisk about seeking ways to make that happen.
Consider everyday challenges to be valuable practice for "everything goes to shit," and they will seem less pointlessly annoying and more productive. This is why expert meditators sometimes do it in crappy conditions, like on the subway.
In Army Special Forces, there is a PACE mnemonic used in planning: What’s the Primary plan? The Alternate plan? The Contingency plan? The Emergency plan? The Emergency Plan is sometimes referred to as the “Everything went to shit plan.”
Thinking about it ...
* The Primary Plan is the best option, what you will do if at all possible. Frex, we want to eat at Cow Heaven.
* The Alternate Plan is a similar option that will also work well, if some part of the Primary Plan is not executable or has become undesirable. If Cow Heaven is closed or too crowded, then we will divert to Meat Mavens. It's just as good, merely a bit farther away.
* The Contingency Plan accounts for specific known failure modes, and you should have a contingency plan for each predictable problem. These are not necessarily similar or as desirable as the Primary Plan, but they will meet the most essential requirements. If pregnant!Sue suddenly announces that she can't stand the smell of cooking meat, we will divert to Salad Palace. It may not be as tasty, but everyone will be able to eat there.
* The Emergency Plan is for when lots of things go wrong at once. It is far from ideal, but will salvage whatever can be accomplished from the original goals. If pregnant!Sue goes into labor, husband!John will drive her to the hospital while the rest of us head home and order pizza. Our evening plans may be shot, but we can at least get some food on the table.
So that's a good standard approach to planning: at least four options, more if you need to cover multiple failure modes with different contingency plans. There won't always be ways to fix all possible problems, but this approach will encourage you to cover what can be predicted and compensated for. It's not paranoia; it's being prepared for whatever comes your way. If anyone picks on you about it, point out the origin of that PACE.
Also, if your "friends" don't want to make accommodations for you or each other based on changing situations like this? They're not such great friends, and maybe not helpful to have in an emergency that requires creative problem-solving at speed. Good friends and competent problem-solvers want everyone to get their needs met as much as possible and are brisk about seeking ways to make that happen.
Consider everyday challenges to be valuable practice for "everything goes to shit," and they will seem less pointlessly annoying and more productive. This is why expert meditators sometimes do it in crappy conditions, like on the subway.