Elizabeth Barrette (ysabetwordsmith) wrote,
Elizabeth Barrette

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Love Languages and Parenting

Here's a thoughtful article on love languages and parenting.  When you show "I love you," it is crucial to show it how the other person feels it, not how you do.  My observations include ...

* Almost all children want to spend quality time with adults they love.  This is probably the leading love language among children, up until the tweens or teens when they start to pull away.  There are exceptions -- some are innate loners and some never really detach -- but that's the trend.  

* The second is probably touch, but there's much more variation here.  Some kids are burrs and others are downright unhuggy.  Again, most start out very cuddly but pull away at tween or teen age, but don't stop offering healthy touch.

* Gifts, words, and service are hit or miss.  Some kids love homemade things, some don't care, some are actively embarrassed by them.  Words can be a lifeline or background noise.  Note that service sometimes conflates with time.

When in doubt, try time first and touch second.  If those don't connect, try the others.

Tags: family skills, networking
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