Curse of the Karma Critters
People say that karma's a bitch,
but it's not true.
Karma doesn't come in wolf form
with snapping jaws and sharp fangs.
It comes in cute balls of fluff,
some in assorted pastels
and other multicolored
like so much cotton candy.
They purr and trill and meep.
They really want to cuddle.
And they want to do it with creeps.
They are attracted to negative karma,
like fuzzy little balls rolling downhill.
They can be summoned, but they
can't hit an innocent victim by mistake.
They're entirely malotropic.
When you first start summoning them,
you get karma tribbles, one to two
at a time, cooing their way to balance.
If they like you, if you reliably
point them in the right direction,
then eventually the Universe
will promote you and start
sending ... other sizes.
Karma bears are bigger and
shaggier, able to move
farther and faster.
They go after meaner prey
and balance bigger accounts.
You get used to them, eventually.
And then one day you come across
a particularly heinous piece of news,
so you do the usual summons, when
the first karma mammoth arrives.
It snuffles at you with its trunk,
gives a basso profundo trill, and
lumbers away to do its duty.
You realize, as the vibrations
slowly fade away, that "bitch" is
so very much of an understatement.
* * *
Karma tribbles can appear in solid or multicolor, usually pastels. You can make your own stuffed tribbles.
Basso profundo is the lowest range.