Elizabeth Barrette (ysabetwordsmith) wrote,
Elizabeth Barrette
ysabetwordsmith

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Poem: "Boundary Lines"

This is the second freebie from the bonus fishbowl, courtesy of new prompters [personal profile] jazzyjj and Deb1789 and new donor Debra Ames.  It was inspired by prompts from [personal profile] lynnoconnacht.  It also fills the "courtship rituals" square in my 6-11-14 card for the [community profile] fanbingo fest.  This poem belongs to the series P.I.E.


"Boundary Lines"


Darrel had made it quite clear
that he didn't want Brenda
to meet his parents, but
they ran into each other
one day at the police station.

With a sigh, Darrel gave in
to the inevitable and made introductions.

Within minutes, Brenda silently admitted
that Darrel had been right all along.

Mrs. Finn simpered and fluttered,
leaning on the arm of Brenda's wheelchair
and occasionally groping for handles that weren't there.

Mr. Finn simply pretended that she did not exist.

It was always a challenge to keep people
from manhandling her hardware
in crowded places, but it was
all the more annoying when they did it
without even that excuse.

Rick was just as bad;
Brenda suspected that
being a construction boss
made him interested in
how things were made.

He had a hard time 
keeping his hands off
her spokes and nuts,
and couldn't keep his
mouth shut if you taped it.

Nate, on the other hand,
tended to drop things in her lap
without looking to make sure
they landed securely, and he
wouldn't sit down to speak with her
but preferred to remain standing.

It was little comfort that he used
the same silly dominance tricks
with everyone else, and it made Brenda
wonder if he was compensating for something.

She usually had to work
at maintaining her boundary lines,
to keep a little bubble of space around herself,
and then again to make people notice her.

She used her hands and arms
in expansive gestures, and
sometimes tapped a foot
even though it startled people.

With Darrel, though, Brenda
didn't have to do any of that.
He flowed around her like wind,
like water, neither hesitating
nor presuming to touch.

Brenda liked that about him,
the way he fit himself into her life
and invited her into his,

their boundaries slowly but surely
beginning to blend together.

* * *

Notes:

The human brain can incorporate a wheelchair into its self-image, so it counts as part of someone's personal space.  Understand the etiquette for wheelchair users and other people with disabilities.

Body language is complicated by such things as gender and social rank.  There are ways to use expansive body language to your advantage. 

Personal boundaries include several types.  Know how to establish and adjust your boundaries to keep people from bothering you.

Close relationships rely on letting your guard down, so you need to know when and how to lower your barriers.  There are always ways of building trust in a relationship.

Tags: cyberfunded creativity, fantasy, fishbowl, poem, poetry, reading, romance, weblit, writing
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  • 2 comments
The hardest part is when you let your guard down, let your boundaries begin to blend with his... and he pulls his boundaries back up again so quickly that they slam you in the face.

Don't do it, Brenda! Keep that guardrail in place!
>> The hardest part is when you let your guard down, let your boundaries begin to blend with his... and he pulls his boundaries back up again so quickly that they slam you in the face. <<

That one sucks, yes. *hugs*

Another frustrating thing that some of my friends struggle with is when they want to invite someone into their life, but it's hard to get the barriers down and then they pop back up at inopportune times, slamming both people in the face.

Healthy barriers should be set where you want them, and responsive enough that you can raise or lower them at will. This ideal is challenging to maintain.

>> Don't do it, Brenda! Keep that guardrail in place! <<

Bear in mind that:

* boundaries are nested, from casual acquaintances through friends to family

* if you don't set boundaries, people will take advantage of you

* but if you don't let anyone in, ever, then you'll have no companionship and no support network

Hence the need for setting appropriate boundaries which can be adjusted at will.