accomplishedWARNING: The following warnings are spoilers, and also very intense. This poem is about extreme racism, bullying, and waterboarding, followed by the aftermath as one of the perpetrators is tormented by what he's done and therefore seeks advice on how to make up for it. The story does end on a relatively hopeful note, though. If these are sensitive issues for you, carefully consider whether you want to read this. Please make sure you're in a steady mindstate before clicking through. (Special thanks to
"Don't Try This at Home"
The doorbell rang. Chris answered it, letting in a kiss of cold air. Then he glared and said, "Git out of here, Eric." That made Pat sit up and take note.
A rangy teen with short blond hair stood on the step, hands fidgeting at his pockets. "I fucked up, Uncle Chris," he said. "I know you don't like me much, but I tried talking to Uncle Luke and he don't understand why I'm all tore up about it. So he said I should come here, that you know this shit. I don't know where else to go."
"Aw, hell," Chris muttered.
"Chris, let him in," Pat said. "If you don't want to deal with him, I'll give it a try." Chris swung the door wide to let Eric in. Pat waved to the couch as Chris made hasty introductions.
Eric looked pale and damp with sweat, not a good combination when the Texan desert could get so chilly at night. Pat touched the back of his hand to the boy's skin and found it clammy. Eric flinched. Pat tugged the afghan off the couch and draped it over Eric's shoulders. Then he backed away.
"What've you fool kids done now?" Chris asked.
"It was just a prank," Eric said, slumping over his knees. "Dan saw TeJay kissing Emily, and that ain't right, so we wrestled him down and was gonna make him eat some dirt. Only Rob wanted to try this thing he saw on TV, with a wet rag over someone's face --"
"You waterboarded someone as a prank?" Pat said, suddenly much less sympathetic. He felt tempted to wash his hands of the kid. "Didn't you pay attention to the part about 'Don't try this at home' then?"
"Well, at least you owned up to it," Chris said. "That ain't your style. What's eating at you?"
Eric shivered, pulling the blanket closer. "I didn't have no stomach for it this time, the way TeJay thrashed around," Eric said. "Then I overheard him telling Emily he couldn't kiss her no more, because it reminded him of what we done." He nibbled on his lip, already pink and swollen. "Next time I tried to kiss my girlfriend, same thing happened to me. I never thought before how lips could feel like a damp hankie."
"Flashbacks," Pat murmured. "Ingrained memories can come back and cause trouble." Perhaps this was an opportunity to teach Eric better ways than he'd learned at home. It wasn't his fault, any more than it had been Chris' fault, that their relatives were bigoted idiots.
"I can't sleep, Uncle Chris. I keep having these awful nightmares. I wake up yelling," said Eric. "I fucked up, and I don't know how to make it right."
"First thing is, you got to say sorry to TeJay," said Chris. "You wanna be chickenshit, you can send him a note; you wanna man up, say it to his face."
"Okay," Eric said, straightening a little.
"Second thing, no more of this horsecrap about how 'it ain't right' for a black boy to kiss a white girl. They got a right to love who they love," Chris said.
Eric cast a guilty glance at Pat's chocolate skin. "I guess."
"I dunno what to do about the nightmares, though. Reckon you'll just have to live with that," Chris said.
"Maybe I can help there," Pat said to Eric. "One thing you could do is learn about waterboarding and why it's wrong. Dreams are how the brain makes sense of things it doesn't fully understand. Once you realize that what you did is torture, you might decide to work against it. That may help your mind put it to rest."
"I ain't good in school," Eric said, licking his lips.
"Then you can practice your reading," Chris said. "We're not gonna grade it. We just want you to think about it."
Pat gestured to the hall door. "You're welcome to spend the night here, Eric," he said. "Sometimes talking about nightmares can help stop them. We'll listen, even if your parents won't."
"Uncle Chris? Can I?" Eric asked.
Chris nodded. "I'll call your mama. She ain't likely to say no, if you've been waking folks up at night. While I'm at it, I'll call TeJay's mama and make sure someone's taking care of him too. But you gotta promise to be polite. These folks are my friends."
"I'll try," Eric whispered.
Pat gave him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. This time Eric didn't flinch, leaning into the support just a little. He felt warmer now, no longer shivering. Pat suspected that Eric would come around, once he had adults who would actually set a good example for him.
"That's all I ask," Pat said. Neither this situation nor the world was all fixed, but at least they were making progress.
Chris seemed to pick up on Eric's hesitation. "I know, your folks wouldn't particularly approve of you being polite to the wrong kinda people, so we'll start slow," Chris said. Then he winked. "Don't try this at home."
* * *
Notes:
Traumatic experiences can put people into emotional shock. Know how to provide emotional first aid.
Waterboarding is a particular method of water torture which, if done correctly, creates the sensation of drowning without allowing water into the lungs. You can watch a video of waterboarding that was done as research for an article on the topic. There are things you can do to stop torture.
Bullying is a problem at many schools. It is harmful not just to the victim but also to the bully. In order to resolve the problem, it's necessary to reach out to bullies and teach them better social skills. Follow the steps to stop being a bully. This also ties into domestic violence, and there is help for abusers too.
Racism is the idea that some people are better than others just because of their color. Children quickly learn racism from their parents. There are ways to stop being racist. This is a theme in Schrodinger's Heroes ever since the introduction of Chris to the team, as he and Pat develop a close friendship despite Chris' redneck upbringing.
Flashbacks and nightmares are common symptoms of trauma. Know how to treat them.
Guilt is a natural emotion after hurting someone. Take steps to apologize, eliminate guilt, and then forgive yourself -- in that order. Notice that Chris and Pat advise Eric to make concrete changes, not just a verbal apology.
Hurting people hurt people for a variety of reasons. Eric's home life probably isn't great. Ostracism and racism can hurt the perpetrators as well as the victims. Compassion for offenders can help them learn to do better and avoid hurting people again.
Teenagers need role models and look for certain qualities in them. Parents can have a positive or negative effect on their children's behavior. Caring adults can help a teen transform their life. Know how to be a good role model -- and understand that teens can be role models for each other, too.
May 25 2014, 18:19:32 UTC 7 years ago
Thank you!
May 25 2014, 18:46:16 UTC 7 years ago
I'm glad this resonates for you.
>> Partly because East Texican sounds a helluva lot like East Tennesseean, for a couple of dozen reasons whose names were Crockett, Houston, Bowie, and the like... <<
Also because my dialect of Southern is in fact from my mother's people in Tennessee. There are a few grammatical differences across the Southern dialects, but most are pronunciation or vocabulary. So I try to tag Texas by looking up examples of vocabulary that I can drop in.
>> partly because N and I have been discussing PTSD associated with kids in the foster system... <<
Remember to check both versions of it, because the acute and chronic forms have some differences in symptoms and treatment. Look at this story and you can see that the kids in question had been screwing around for a while like this, but it hadn't broken anyone until just now. Sometimes persistent bullying can add up to complex PTSD. Other times it's like this, where one specific incident produces singular PTSD.
>> partly because both of us have unpleasant bits in our personal histories, as do you... <<
Sooth. But this is one way to put that experience to good use.
>> and partly because I have personal knowledge of that kind of racism... :( <<
Ack, forgot to warn for racism! *facepalm* Fixing that now.