?

Log in

No account? Create an account
entries friends calendar profile PenUltimate Productions Website Previous Previous Next Next
The Wordsmith's Forge
The Writing & Other Projects of Elizabeth Barrette
ysabetwordsmith
ysabetwordsmith
Poem: "The Lord of Pr0n"

This poem came out of the January 8, 2013 Poetry Fishbowl.  It was inspired by a comment from Dreamwidth user  Chordatesrock  under  "A Solitary Secession."  It also fills the "au: hooker/porn/stripper" square on my  Trope Bingo card.  It has been sponsored by Anthony & Shirley Barrette.  This poem belongs to the series An Army of One.  You can read more about  alternative currency  online.

Format:  Poetry
Title:  "The Pr0n Lord"
Fandom:  Original (An Army of One)
Summary:   In an area of space where a bunch of autistic soldiers have recently seceded from the surrounding galactic powers, one man comes up with an unusual choice of alternative currency.
Required Warnings:  No standard warnings apply.  This poem is not particularly dirty, but it's a bit dingy because it talks about people using pr0n.  If that's a turn-off for you, feel free to skip it.


The Lord of Pr0n


In order to survive,
the secessionists living in the Lacuna
had to find ways of supporting themselves.

The people made of meat needed food,
the people made of machinery needed parts,
and everyone needed ciphernet access.

It was hard enough to meet such needs
in a time of peace when they had been provided free;
it was all the more difficult to manage
with both the Orion and Carinan armies
trying to kill them.

The secessionists were not without resources, though:
they had their skills, many of which were exceptional,
and some of them had cleverly hoarded things
which turned out to be valuable as alternative currency.

One of these was a fellow
who called himself the Lord of Pr0n.
If it involved any kind of erotic activity imaginable,
he had a sample of it somewhere in his archive,
and he'd trade you a copy in exchange for
some protein bars or memory chips.

People laughed, at first,
because it was a ridiculous base for an economy,
but it put the beans on the table
and so they let it ride.

When the Orion high command
somehow managed to track down his station
and ordered an attack,
they were bemused to find that
no one  was willing to fire on the Lord of Pr0n
and then their database melted down
so the point was moot.

After that,
people stopped laughing
and started typing
~salute~ or ~bow~
when they ciphered him.

Tags: , , , , , ,
Current Mood: busy busy

14 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
aldersprig From: aldersprig Date: January 12th, 2013 03:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
:-D
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: January 12th, 2013 04:23 pm (UTC) (Link)

Thank you!

I'm glad you like it.
mdlbear From: mdlbear Date: January 12th, 2013 06:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
O_O
aldersprig From: aldersprig Date: January 12th, 2013 10:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
=^_^=?
natf From: natf Date: February 24th, 2013 11:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
≈^..^≈ !
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: February 24th, 2013 11:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

*laugh*

Good ones.
From: technoshaman Date: January 13th, 2013 12:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Some needs just will not be argued with, no matter how the priests try. *GRIN*
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: January 13th, 2013 05:39 am (UTC) (Link)

Yes...

That's true.

This is one of the "deviate and vary" poems. I'd started out with part of the official description for autism, which observes that many autistic people are unmoved by common interests. Then someone mentioned knowing one who was into pr0n, and I thought, yeah I can use that -- in the military it would be great trade stock.
From: julia kolb Date: August 30th, 2015 08:00 pm (UTC) (Link)

Anomalous

Hahahahaha!
From: (Anonymous) Date: November 17th, 2017 06:50 am (UTC) (Link)
Don't mess with the guy who keeps everyone's stockpiles of sensory input, NOBODY will be on your side in that fight.

Even if it's less for sexual gratification, everyone has some sensory need that I'm sure the Lord of Pr0n can accomodate, like stimvids or ASMR. I'm quite fond of paint-mixing and slime gifs as my visual-sensory Pr0n, even though the most of a human I ever see in them is nicely manicured hands.

--BairnSidhe
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: November 17th, 2017 07:35 am (UTC) (Link)

Thoughts

>>Don't mess with the guy who keeps everyone's stockpiles of sensory input, NOBODY will be on your side in that fight.<<

LOL yes.

>> Even if it's less for sexual gratification, everyone has some sensory need that I'm sure the Lord of Pr0n can accomodate, like stimvids or ASMR.<<

I think there are mentions in other poems of his cache including platonic topics too. He's all over the garden development.

>> I'm quite fond of paint-mixing and slime gifs as my visual-sensory Pr0n, even though the most of a human I ever see in them is nicely manicured hands.<<

Fascinating.

Have you met oobleck?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKQJAyeCFcI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weSTbkh_VJM
fayanora From: fayanora Date: April 13th, 2018 12:39 pm (UTC) (Link)
"and then their database melted down
so the point was moot."

I'm confused about who exactly it was that lost their database.
ysabetwordsmith From: ysabetwordsmith Date: April 13th, 2018 05:57 pm (UTC) (Link)

Well ...

The Orion high command who had ordered the attack.
fayanora From: fayanora Date: April 14th, 2018 01:54 pm (UTC) (Link)

RE: Well ...

Thanks!
14 comments or Leave a comment