This poem came out of the October 2-3, 2012 Poetry Fishbowl. It was inspired by prompts from DW user jjhunter and Anthony & Shirley Barrette.
WARNING: This is rude political humor of the anti-Republican flavor. If you're a conservative or you're just tired of politics, you may want to skip it.
Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan
went into a huddle in the living room.
They talked about plans and goals,
ideals, strategies, objectives,
principles and platforms.
Some of their ideas were knocking on
a bit in years, losing the mass appeal.
They knew about that. It worried them.
But they refused to give up
and clung to those ideas all the harder.
"This is going to cost us the nomination,"
Romney grumbled, "let alone the election."
"We just need to make Obama look worse,"
Ryan insisted. "This can still work."
Romney threw up his hands.
"What else can we do to him?"
he protested. "We have already
stonewalled his socialist bills and
pushed women back home where they belong
and lobbied for voter identification."
"I don't know," Ryan said grimly,
poring over the survey results,
"but we had better think of something."
Just then someone knocked on the door.
Romney answered it to find
two men in tidy suits,
one taller and one shorter.
"Any souls for sale?"
said the taller one.
"Any impossible wishes?"
said the shorter one.
Their eyes glinted red.
Romney waved his hand.
"I've thought of something!"
Half an hour later,
the Contract was concluded;
everyone shook hands
and went their separate ways.
Romney and Ryan
left their paperwork on the table
and went to watch orgy porn.
The two demons
hurried down the sidewalk,
shoving each other playfully.
"They actually said that?"
the taller demon said,
"Give us the nomination?"
"Yep," the shorter demon said,
"signed, sealed, and delivered."
gotta love it," the taller demon said.
And the two of them went back to Hell,
laughing all the way.