busySleeping & Other Spacial Closeness
Everyone has a bubble of space around them, its size varying by culture, but usually about arm-length. Strangers and casual acquaintances customarily stay outside that area. Friends and coworkers will touch or slightly overlap edges. Only close friends, lovers, and family members tend to come into very close physical proximity. This is especially true in terms of sleeping, sitting, or traveling in the same space. In fact "sleeping together" is a euphemism for sexual intercourse, precisely because of its intimacy. However, that intimacy can be just as deep -- or deeper -- without involving anything sexual at all.
Putting someone to bed. Interestingly, this activity can happen among people who are just getting to know each other -- most often if someone passes out drunk, but exhaustion can have a similar effect. It's a gesture of caring to put someone to bed rather than leave them where they drop. A milder version involves draping a blanket or coat over a person asleep on a couch or the like.
Sleeping in the same bed. This is an act of shared vulnerability and intimacy. Lovers customarily do this; so do some siblings or friends, especially as children. People may also be driven to share a bed, sleeping bag, etc. for warmth or lack of other accommodations in challenging circumstances.
Watching someone sleep. There is more vulnerability on the part of the sleeper, and more intimacy from the watcher, when only one person is asleep. Parents often watch their children sleep. Lovers sometimes do this with each other, which can be cute or creepy. It's also a guard position, useful for showing that one character seeks to protect another.
Waking someone up from a nightmare. A subtler form of rescue than more physical actions, this is still a gesture of protection and caring. It often leads to comfort afterwards. A typical courtesy between parent and child, or lovers, this can also be an early threshold for characters thrust together unexpectedly if one of them has sturdy daytime walls and a lot of issues. It is common, but often unspoken, among war buddies or veterans, many of whom have nightmares.
Camping or hiking overnight. You wind up sharing a tent, if you're lucky enough to have one, perhaps a blanket or a pile of leaves if you're unlucky. Long-distance wilderneering pushes people to rely on each other as well as share space and more intimate awareness.
Sharing a saddle. Riding a horse or other animal requires a careful coordination of two bodies; adding a third makes it even more complex. The motion usually causes two people to rub against each other constantly, and fighting it throws everyone off-balance. Either you learn to cooperate very closely, or you wind up very uncomfortable. Friends often ride together; lovers and family members sometimes do; but this can also happen with strangers meeting during a rescue. It's a good way to push standoffish characters together.
Sharing car/berth space on a long trip. This is less intimate than riding, but still involves relatively close contact over an extended time. That usually gets people talking, a terrific icebreaker early in a relationship. In established relationships it offers a chance to spend time together and catch up on news.
Reply
November 19 2012, 07:13:20 UTC 8 years ago Edited: November 19 2012, 07:15:10 UTC
Like someone else said, it's a whole lot better to do it bareback and to make sure your horse/mount is strong enough to handle it.
On fun days, days when we don't have lessons or anything, we just go out and ride, my friends and I do this sometimes. Believe me when I say you better have small friends.
The best way to do this if you actually have a saddle (if your friend is too big to fit on the back of the saddle behind you) is to seat them immediately behind the saddle and have them hold onto you (sort of like they do in the movies, but not really). That way, they have a little bit better balance, and they're not too far back on the horse's haunches to provide immense discomfort.
Still, it's a lot better for the riders and the horse to just double ride bareback.
There are bigger saddles that can technically accommodate more than one person; however, they're not well-used and very difficult to get on and off. They're a fair bit heavier than 'normal' saddles, you see.
Re: Reply
November 26 2012, 05:43:38 UTC 8 years ago
I've shared a saddle, but we were both in our tweens at the time. With full-sized characters it would be a lot harder.
>>Like someone else said, it's a whole lot better to do it bareback and to make sure your horse/mount is strong enough to handle it.<<
Agreed, if it's feasible. If you're stuck in the wilderness, you might not want to lose the saddle.
>>There are bigger saddles that can technically accommodate more than one person; however, they're not well-used and very difficult to get on and off. They're a fair bit heavier than 'normal' saddles, you see.<<
Now there's an idea for a fun scene, watching two characters try to wrestle a double saddle into place.