Elizabeth Barrette (ysabetwordsmith) wrote,
Elizabeth Barrette
ysabetwordsmith
  • Mood: busy

Poem: "Redemption"

This poem was prompted by wyld_dandelyon and janetmiles, and sponsored by janetmiles.  It also draws on personal experience, when a covenmate passed away.  The "Third Road" is a reference to the path that leads, not to Heaven or Hell, but to Faery and the Summerland beyond.


Redemption


The young Pagan man gazed at the two gates,
one of gold and pearl,
one of iron and onyx.

He looked down at the coupon in his hand:
Last Rites:
Get out of Hell free!
Remit one.

Then he turned to the frayed soul behind him,
a teenager dead from overdose,
lank hair swinging around a pinched face.
"Hey, kid, do you want this?
I'm headed for Summerland myself."

A tentative nod answered his question.
He pressed the coupon into the waiting hand.
The teenager's tired eyes turned toward the bright gate.

The Pagan soul stepped out of the line
and strolled away down the Third Road,
a winding path fringed with blackberries and apple trees
soon disappearing into the undergrowth.

Tags: cyberfunded creativity, fishbowl, paganism, poem, poetry, reading, spirituality, writing
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  • 30 comments
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ladymondegreen

ladymondegreen

August 2 2011, 21:07:19 UTC 9 years ago

That's lovely.
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 4 2011, 22:45:31 UTC 9 years ago

I'm happy to hear that.
queenmaggie

queenmaggie

August 2 2011, 21:10:40 UTC 9 years ago

That is a delightful image. Brightness!!
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 2 2011, 21:15:11 UTC 9 years ago

I'm glad you like this.

Poetry fishbowl is still open for prompts, too.
minor_architect

minor_architect

August 2 2011, 21:23:10 UTC 9 years ago

I was hoping this one would get sponsored...the thumbnail description you posted earlier kinda hooked me. ;)
ysabetwordsmith

Yes...

ysabetwordsmith

August 2 2011, 21:25:53 UTC 9 years ago

It turned into a fast grab, which is always a good sign; and I'm very pleased that I get to share this one.
moonwolf1988

moonwolf1988

August 2 2011, 21:25:50 UTC 9 years ago

That's beautiful.
ysabetwordsmith

Yay!

ysabetwordsmith

August 4 2011, 22:42:27 UTC 9 years ago

I'm glad you like it!
angela_n_hunt

angela_n_hunt

August 2 2011, 21:48:12 UTC 9 years ago

I love this SO much.
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 4 2011, 22:40:56 UTC 9 years ago

I'm happy to hear that.
siliconshaman

siliconshaman

August 2 2011, 23:09:50 UTC 9 years ago

*grins*

yup, sounds about right..
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 2 2011, 23:15:13 UTC 9 years ago

I'm glad you like this.
cflute

cflute

9 years ago

  • New comment
siliconshaman

siliconshaman

9 years ago

  • New comment

Deleted comment

ysabetwordsmith

Yes...

ysabetwordsmith

August 3 2011, 00:09:35 UTC 9 years ago

There are always other options. People are just taught not to see them. I subvert that malware whenever I can.
fayanora

fayanora

August 3 2011, 00:14:52 UTC 9 years ago

Iron and onyx? Is that a historical description of the gates of Hell? I wonder because in the Yahgahn culture of Traipah, and a lot of the rest of the planet, black and white have opposite associations. Neither is actually associated with evil, but black is positive and white is negative. And Shao'Kehn (Djao'Kain) is associated with both onyx and with fire.
ysabetwordsmith

Hmm...

ysabetwordsmith

August 4 2011, 22:39:22 UTC 9 years ago

>>Iron and onyx? Is that a historical description of the gates of Hell? <<

Yes and no. I haven't seen them combined like that, specifically; but I've seen references to each separately, and illustrations of the gates of Hell are usually done in black. It seemed plausible -- and a good reversal of the gates to Heaven, which are traditionally pearl and/or gold.
fayanora

fayanora

August 3 2011, 00:15:23 UTC 9 years ago

Awesome poem, by the way.
eseme

eseme

August 3 2011, 01:52:18 UTC 9 years ago

Oh, I do love the idea of options, and helping others. Great poem.
janetmiles

janetmiles

August 3 2011, 01:54:30 UTC 9 years ago

Oh, most excellent. I admit I was kind of hoping for something a little bit sillier ("Why do I have this coupon? Did someone in the Main Office get the wrong mailing list?"), but this is very satisfying.
aldersprig

aldersprig

August 3 2011, 02:38:30 UTC 9 years ago

I... really liked this. Not just for the Third Option, but for the Good, the truly good, in giving the kid a last second chance.
ysabetwordsmith

Yes...

ysabetwordsmith

August 4 2011, 22:17:55 UTC 9 years ago

Sometimes it happens that way. I'm glad you enjoyed this.
mdlbear

mdlbear

August 3 2011, 03:06:00 UTC 9 years ago

Very nice. I've always been fascinated by the third road.
ysabetwordsmith

Yes...

ysabetwordsmith

August 3 2011, 03:17:02 UTC 9 years ago

The Third Road holds a great deal of attraction for me too; I enjoy following it through its appearances in folklore.
cflute

cflute

August 3 2011, 05:44:06 UTC 9 years ago

I absolutely love this! It's fabulous.
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 3 2011, 06:35:57 UTC 9 years ago

I'm delighted to hear that.
laffingkat

laffingkat

August 3 2011, 06:56:44 UTC 9 years ago

Hooray for the Third Road and seeking other options! Nice that someone else gets an extra option here too.
ysabetwordsmith

Thank you!

ysabetwordsmith

August 3 2011, 07:00:06 UTC 9 years ago

Yes, sometimes salvation comes upon us all unlooked-for.
Previous
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  • Goldenrod Gall Contents

    Apparently all kinds of things go on inside goldenrod galls, beyond the caterpillars who make them. Fascinating. I've seen the galls but haven't…

  • Science and Spirituality

    Here's an article about science and spirituality, sort of. It doesn't have a very wide view of either. Can you be scientific and spiritual? This…

  • Geniuses

    This article asks if geniuses are real. Gee thanks, assholes. It's not enough to be treated like a vending machine, now you want to play the erasure…