Elizabeth Barrette (ysabetwordsmith) wrote,
Elizabeth Barrette
ysabetwordsmith

  • Mood:

Poem: "Moral Traditions"

This poem came out of the May 3, 2011 Poetry Fishbowl.  It was inspired by new prompter idhren24 and sponsored by laffingkat. If you like the idea of updated folk tales, I've done some in my own poetry and fiction -- but I also recommend the work of Rosemary Lake.


Moral Traditions


Time is not locked
in a crystal casket.
It twists and grows
like a beanstalk.
What we knew
when the world was new
sometimes changes
as we climb higher.
the patterns remain --
three brothers,
glass slippers,
swords and dragons --
but the messages
can be as different
as bud and blossom,
upholding fresh virtues.
The hero can be rescued
from a terrible fate.
The heroine can
save the world.
He can be gentle
as well as handsome.
She can be smart
as well as beautiful.
Sometimes two princes
or two princesses
share the kiss
of true love.
Sometimes the key
closes, not opens.
Sometimes the monster
is the man, not the beast.
Sometimes the bandit is
not evil but misunderstood.
Sometimes the witch is
not adversary but teacher.
Folk tales are
beans and rice,
gold and clay,
food for thought.
The tales we tell
determine what we
pass down in our
moral traditions.

Tags: cyberfunded creativity, fantasy, fishbowl, history, poem, poetry, reading, writing
Subscribe

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 16 comments
Folks, this is my first-reader. My first-reader is good. If you enjoy my fiction, this would be part of why. He's more use than some professional editors I've worked with.

Deleted comment

>> I treat my wife and my daughter as my first readers, although many, many, many people say that you should never do that. Over, and over, and over again, I've heard that family members cannot possibly give a writer an objective opinion, that their feelings toward the writer will affect their opinions of what's written. <<

Well, it depends on your friends and family. I started out with my parents as first-readers. They are both teachers. They read over my stories with the eye of an experienced grader. This did wonders for my basic writing skills. They also love literature (duh, look at my given name) and got me hooked on that. So, they're also qualified to comment on aesthetic aspects.

Then I had various friends join in. I still use friends as first-readers sometimes, especially when they've asked to see a particular story or if they have some relevant expertise.

Then I met my_partner_doug who is a deep reader and whose brother is an editor. He pretty much killed a chicken over the first few things I handed him. So both my technical skills and my artistic skills got honed further. Of all the folks I've worked with, he's done the most in terms of structural improvements -- working on my tendency to get scenes out of sequence. (I don't always receive them in chronological order.) By that point, too, I'd worked with a number of fan and professional editors. His comments started out on par with the average and quickly improved. Right now, I haven't worked with anyone of higher editorial skill, and plenty of folks I've worked with are below that. I've repeatedly had editors remark on how clean my manuscripts are. That's because I've done a lot of polishing at home, and the fiction has already been edited before it goes out.

Anyone whose family members are reasonably honest, and have relevant skills such as teaching, secretarial experience, linguistics, journalism, library work, other extensive reading/writing experience, etc. is perfectly justified in drawing on that expertise. Random people who just say "This is great!" or "This sucks," however, are not very useful. That does describe the kind of folks that many writers know.

>>Still, both my wife and daughter are smart, independent-minded, learned individuals who will tell me flat-out if something isn't working. <<

You are lucky!