Some thoughts for improvement:
1) If someone says they don't want to do something, and it's not an emergency, don't rag them about it. Really. That's obnoxious. Respect people's boundaries, unless it's totally impossible or interferes with your own needs in some way. If there's a boundary conflict, try to discuss it in a rational manner rather than harassing the other person.
2) If you have a hard time describing something in words, try pictures. For the haircut example, that works great. Salons almost always have a pile of magazines with haircut pictures. Flip through in search of one you like or at least find tolerable.