busyThis note popped up in my email today:
Holiday Survival GuideYou're fond of Uncle Burt, but he's picked up some very strange ideas about climate change from Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin. And Aunt Mim is all for mountaintop-removal mining and "clean" coal -- though she's not exactly sure what they are.
Have you got your own slightly misinformed relatives to deal with this holiday season? Read our Survival Guide and learn how to set them straight without getting the pecan pie thrown at you.
http://action.sierraclub.org/site/R?i=Ios_uJWoVO728QYszQsVJQ
http://action.sierraclub.org/site/R?i=z8UpC8BJ_7isK1NLyW3YVA
http://action.sierraclub.org/site/R?i=2VQZGIwMr92A1HTfBxHWMg
My thoughts on mixing activism and holidays are ... a little different.
1) The goal of holiday gatherings is to nurture family ties, not political ones. Adding a political or personal agenda to the mix is generally not a good idea, unless your family already has very fluent communication skills -- and if that's the case, you don't need this kind of advice anyhow. So don't be the one to bring up a hot topic. Talk about things you can reasonably expect people to enjoy hearing.
2) If someone else brings up a controversial topic, and you disagree with their stance, you can:
* change the topic.
* leave the conversation.
* ignore it.
* pretend to agree.
* stand your ground and disagree.
Which of those you choose will depend on what is safe and sane within your family context. It's a good idea to think ahead about which is most likely, though. If you're going to change the topic, load up on news that will fascinate your relatives without starting a fight. If you're going to tune out, bring something to amuse yourself quietly elsewhere. If you're going to argue a point, arm yourself with good arguments first -- and pick those based on whether your family is more convinced by facts, emotions, faith, or some other input.
3) Aim for a pleasant or at least tolerable atmosphere. If your relatives can't manage to be civil for at least a few hours or days, seriously consider spending the holidays elsewhere. You're not a punching bag; you have better things to do.
4) If you want to have serious discussions about touchy issues with your family, that's fine. Arrange a time when you can get together in pairs or small groups without hijacking some occasion like a holiday or a wedding. Try to explore multiple perspectives. Make sure that everyone gets a time to talk and a time to listen (including children, if any). Respect each other even if you can't respect all the ideals they hold. Watch for valid concerns and common ground -- those are crucial foundations for understanding, whether or not you prefer the same solutions. People who love you will respect your right to your informed opinions, even if they don't share them; you should do the same. And if nobody's prepared to do that, you probably shouldn't be spending time together, or should be spending it brushing up on your people skills first.
November 24 2010, 05:45:29 UTC 10 years ago
November 24 2010, 16:23:34 UTC 10 years ago
*bow, flourish*
November 24 2010, 20:05:55 UTC 10 years ago